My bad days.

Okay well. The RIMUP went so well I wanted it again. My legs were in massive, terribly unspeakable pain I can hardly walk.
Georgiana was crazy of Leon & she kept on aww-ing the whole time. Haha! He got her. I mean, who wouldn't fall for somebody cute like him? I did once. I tried not to tell... anybody else. Vanessa, Michelle, Hazel & Irene knew about this. And Selina. Well what's the big deal?
He is too gorgeous.
No way. I'm not saying that again here.
Back to the RIMUP. Michelle wore light blue contacts. She looked like a vampire, because she had long canines. & she wore that blue contacts. She looked pretty. Her Orang Ulu costume was right on her. She looked... beautiful.
Titus & Irene dated... after Irene 'escaped' from the hall. We waited for TWO damned hours for the VIP to come. I didn't mind though, because I had time to enjoy.
Hazel went all emo. The emo cheongsam girl. Glen didn't come so she felt left out. Who doesn't when you need your loved ones? Speaking of Hazel, I can't read her blog. All of them are symbols & my head got jumbled up.
Vanessa was as usual... A little girl in her own world. I interpret it like that because I know she felt from the inside. I've been through them THOUSANDS of times.
The best part was everything that happened that day. Everything went easy... Except for that the feelings creep in me again.
I fell for him once, & I'm over it. But then I fell again, for I know I wasn't gonna stop liking him.

Is this love?

The weird things.

The debate today was so not okay with me. Why? Because I stuttered when everyone watched at me. I don't like standing in front of the pupils and talk... about gays.
Well, I agree that 'Gay Marriages Should Be Allowed'. I was the government but well, the opposition won. WTF. 
Mrs. Lee gave us like two weeks for the preparation. And I was confident I can do it... until she asked for the definition of Gay Marriage. 
Wow. That's when everything was tense and everybody looked at me. Since I was the first speaker... I cannot do any debate anymore.
Enough said. Emma and Ervin became good friends today. Haha. Never though they would be good friends after all this while they fought like cats and dogs. I don't know why; but there's always something similar between you and your frenemy.
I'm very, very tired. So very tired. Haha :D


I'll update soon. :)

Something I knew I needed.

Something must be so great, now. 

Very great. 

Jesus, I love you! :)

Everybody is asking why I became so... good? 

Because God changed me. He showed me what I should do. I belong with Him, and nothing else could change that. I'm thankful to Dior, for giving me the link to the video.

I don't know, when I watched it, I felt some kinda scary thing creep inside me.

A Letter from Hell.

I'm sure everybody know the video. I love God! He showed me they way back! :)

I knew He waited for me. I knew He wanted me to be happy. Forever, with Him.

When are you coming back? :)

My regrets.

I'm sorry. I am so, so sorry. You know who you are don't you? I know I've been a bad person to you.

Thank you, thank you for being there when I needed help. I don't know how to thank you much. 

For all that you've done, I hope God bless you everywhere you go, everything you do, and every decision you make. 

Sometimes we just have to sit there and think back the old time when we used to play and laugh together, don't we? 

The old times when we sing together, we laugh together, we smiled until no end together, we think together, and cry together. 

You might think we forget about you, but just to make sure you know, we will never forget you. 

My friends might hate you for all you've done, but one day, they're going to ask how are you, and what happened to you.

You helped us when we're in troubles. 

You made us happy when we're down. 

You talk to us when we have troubles.

You never think something is impossible to you. Never. 

Please forgive me. I know you love us. And this memory will never, ever fade from my mind. 

Thank you. 

The report card.

It was great... I guess. I can't believe the teachers said I'm nice in class. Me? Nice? Maybe to the teachers only but I can hardly be nice to peoples at times. Jeez. I felt lonely and left out, that's why I keep quiet and 'concentrate'. I don't really concentrate because I daydream a lot. 

And then, everybody opened the topic, JOSHUA.

I felt something churning and twisting in my stomach and I felt like I wanna puke, but somehow I managed to stay and listen to what they have to say. 

It's the natural feelings you get when you're nervous. 

I can't stop smiling when they started talking about my behavior and what I do in class. And suddenly, mom asked about my 'boyfriend' thing, AND my heart thumped faster. I swear it was going to drop anytime. 

I got the 8th position in class, but it meant nothing at all. My marks are low and I have to improve this second semester.

It was a history.

This afternoon we had an assembly. Well, we have it every Tuesday. Mr. Edgar said something about parents and teachers meeting for the report card... I was scared. I had too much problem, where my class teacher actually called mom because... well, I dated a guy. Not just a guy, a troublesome guy. Now he's far, far away from Kuching, and I missed him. Too bad we have to break up. T_T
_________________________________________________________________________


We had KHB... It was... boring. Not that boring, I was a little bit mad with Mr. Ong because he didn't tell us about bringing A4 paper for the project. So Ervin, Selina and I asked from Mdm. Lee. Luckily she was a nice woman, I know she was willing to help.
The prefects had photo-taking session today. It was... tiring. Why? Because, we stood up for 10-15 bloody minutes just to wait for the teachers to come in. Ervin promised not to smile, but what can I say? Vanessa, Selina, Lyn and I kept on teasing him with Emma. It's what we do to make him mad and SMILE. :P
_________________________________________________________________________


Another 'history' made by Ervin. He 'sulked' for hell a long time, and we were scared. He acted like he slept, so Irene, Selina and I teased him. And obviously... with Emma, again. That's the only way I could make him smile, or even flash me an evil look. Haaaa. :D

Maybe it's the start of something new.

He's gone, I think forever. I know it's not worth it, but how am I suppose to lie to myself? Ergh -.-''

Yesterday, Ervin totally told us (Irene, Selina and I) that he thought this Chinese girl is cute. Our jaw totally dropped and we screamed, 'What?!' to his face. Seriously, I don't know he could say this. I'm not jealous or thing, but he's my friend and I care about him. I don't want him to get hurt like before. That girl is not that pretty, yet she's so thin. One more thing, she doesn't have any boobs. Okay, I admit, I criticize a lot! But that's my nature, but on second thought,
Selina said Emma is better than that girl. Yes, Emma. But they can't be together, basically because they hate each other. I don't understand, but whatever.
I don't know what's happening to me lately. I've been PMSing everyone including Irene, and I pitied her because sometimes if she asks questions, I answered her with a loud voice. I mean, screaming. I hate this. I finished my period already, but PMS? -.-''

Okay, I'm on fb now. :]